The four agreements© were published in 1997 and have sold about 9 million times. He has been on the New York Times bestseller list for nearly a decade. Everything we do is based on agreements we have made – agreements with ourselves, with other people, with God, with life. But the most important agreements are those we make with ourselves. Ruiz explains that this agreement is certainly the most important, but that the most difficult thing is to respect it.  For this agreement, Ruiz first analyzes the word “irreprocible.” The perfectly irreproachable word comes from the Latin word peccatus, which means “sin,” and the term “im” at the beginning of blame is the Latin prefix meaning “without.” Ruiz describes a sin as all that goes against himself, and therefore to be impeccable with language is to assume the responsibility of one and without judgment against oneself and against the other.  This agreement focuses primarily on the importance of speaking with integrity and carefully choosing the words before saying it out loud.  The Fourth Agreement allows readers to have a better understanding of the progress made in achieving their goals in life. This agreement involves the integration of the first three agreements into daily life and the exploitation of its own potential.  It is a matter of doing the best that can be managed individually, which varies from the different situations and circumstances that the individual may encounter. Ruiz believes that if you judge yourself and do your best at all times, you will be able to avoid remorse.  By integrating the first three chords and doing the best in all facets of life, the individual will be able to lead a life without grief or self-awareness.
 I appreciate your comment. Thank you for your kind words. Not taking things personally and not making assumptions is very closely linked, because the two are based on our own reality. If you can accept that other people have different realities from you (based on their beliefs, experiences, etc.), you can start to see their words and actions that are around them, not you. This applies to both agreements, as they go hand in hand. We assume we know what people think, and then we customize it to do it on us. If you`re waiting for someone`s text and they`re not coming, you might think it`s because they met someone else. This is both provided (you don`t know if he`s met anyone) and personalized (you think it`s because you`re not good enough). They`re different, but often together. When someone moves, it`s more because of their own fears than you do.
If I have time, I will try to include a longer response on my FB Live at Noon PST on Thursday. therefore….. Your question about it: “Assumptions – Truth vs. Fantasy” in an uncertain relationship, I wonder how “not to face the uncomfortable truth that maybe your partner doesn`t want to engage you” (so take other reasons) and how “to be mirroring for each other” is not just a customization. They are supposed to ask questions, because the whole way we avoid asking questions leads us to the hypothesis. Does that make sense? If we spend all our time accepting and making fantasies, instead of worrying about the truth of a situation (not just questions) but clearly saying why we are in this relationship, where every detail where one of the two people is is murky. As for mirrors, everyone is a mirror for you. Everybody. Things hidden in our subconscious can be revealed if we look at how we judge the behaviour of others and do not seek it in ourselves. That is it — you do not customize them at all — if you want to know more about yourself and why you are in that position.